Page 2552 - Shakespeare - Vol. 2

they would melt me out of my fat drop by drop, and liquor fishermen’s boots
with me; I warrant they would whip me with their fine wits till I were as
crest-fallen as a dried [90] pear. I never prospered since I forswore myself at
primero. Well, if my wind were but long enough, I would repent.

Enter Mistress Quickly.
Now, whence come you?

QUICKLY
From the two parties, forsooth. [95]

FALSTAFF
The devil take one party, and his dam the other, and so they shall be both
bestowed. I have suffered more for their sakes − more than the villainous

inconstancy of man’s disposition is able to bear.

QUICKLY
And have not they suffered? Yes, I warrant, [100] speciously one of them:
Mistress Ford, good heart, is beaten black and blue, that you cannot see a
white spot about her.

FALSTAFF
What tell’st thou me of black and blue? I was beaten myself into all the

colours of the rainbow; and I [105] was like to be apprehended for the witch
of Brainford. But that my admirable dexterity of wit, my counterfeiting the
action of an old woman, delivered me, the knave constable had set me i’ th’
stocks, i’ th’ common stocks, for a witch. [110]

QUICKLY

Sir, let me speak with you in your chamber: you shall hear how things go and,
I warrant, to your content. Here is a letter will say somewhat. Good hearts,
what ado here is to bring you together! Sure, one of you does not serve
heaven well, that you are so crossed. [115]

FALSTAFF
Come up into my chamber.

Exeunt.