Page 2523 - Shakespeare - Vol. 2
P. 2523
[5] Thames? Well, if I be served such another trick, I’ll have my brains ta’en
out and buttered, and give them to a dog for a New Year’s gift. The rogues
slighted me into the river with as little remorse as they would have drowned
a blind bitch’s puppies, fifteen i’ th’ litter; and you may [10] know by my size
that I have a kind of alacrity in sinking: if the bottom were as deep as hell, I
should down. I had been drowned but that the shore was shelvy and shallow
− a death that I abhor: for the water swells a man; and what a thing should I
have been when I had been [15] swelled! I should have been a mountain of
mummy.
[Enter Bardolph with sack.]
BARDOLPH
Here’s Mistress Quickly, sir, to speak with you.
FALSTAFF
Come, let me pour in some sack to the Thames water: for my belly’s as cold
as if I had swallowed snowballs for pills to cool the reins. Call her in. [20]
BARDOLPH
Come in, woman!
Enter Mistress Quickly.
QUICKLY
By your leave; I cry you mercy. Give your worship good morrow.
FALSTAFF
Take away these chalices. Go brew me a pottle of sack finely. [25]
BARDOLPH
With eggs, sir?
FALSTAFF
Simple of itself; I’ll no pullet-sperm in my brewage. [Exit Bardolph.] How
now?
